git-r-done

i've been lazy and lacking motivation. there's people (i.e. one person) i need to call - but i don't want to. so i dance around it with emails and text messages. you'd think at 22, i might be a little more grown up. i especially love how i hear nothing back. yeah. real friggin' charming! :-/

today, i got my mom's car. my dad dropped me off at my mom's kinda early - but what can i do, right? i was the one with no vehicle, therefore needing to cater to other people's schedule. so i sat around all day and did a whole lot of nothing. i made sure i stayed to see my mom and jim and make small talk with both of them. and then i left. i thought it might be rude if i just kinda took the keys from my mom when she walked in the door and left.

i went out to rent some movies. the incredibles won't play - and i'm not going back to hollywood video as scrubby as i am. not that i necessarily care - i'm not going to impress anybody. i just don't wanna go. so maybe i'll go tomorrow.

tomorrow night, i get to see david. and i'm excited. i love how easy and stress-free this relationship is. it's a um, oh, i believe EYE-OPENER is the correct phrase.

i never did go on that interview at that engineering place cuz i decided it was too far. i already drove to and from phx/tempe border. i hated it. so i went on an interview at a mortgage place. and i guess it seems alright - tho i think the people i met with should be named muffin and charles livingston III, not kathy and whatever his name was. and for having offers of at least $11/hr - it's kinda hard for me to be ok with $10... i feel so dicouraged about this job thing. i really and truly do!

and my school schedule does not help even a little bit. that last damn required class is offered at the shittiest times. all the classes were offered at shitty times. what a pain in the ass.

mostly i don't do anything anymore cuz i don't really want to. when i have a job, i go to work. when i don't, i hang out and do nothing - or i go to my mom's house to lay in the pool and do nothing. i go to bible study and i try to go to church. at night, i work on homework. i'm in bed by 9, 10 at the latest. i leave if i get to see david or if have to go run an errand. sometimes, i go to my mom's on the weekend and invite alicia and hayden over to swim. it's a lonely life - but i'm content.

i think i've just decided i hate the superficiality of the world outside of what i know.